Dark Tournament of Love
by MystiKoorime
Summary: Yusuke admonishes the team for their lack of professionalism during the Dark Tournament.  Mostly humor with slight H/B.  Originally intended for More Than Anyone Else, but had to be scrapped.


When I originally started _More Than Anyone Else_ back in 2010, I had already written out a bunch of scenes that I intended to incorporate into each chapter as I went along. This particular one was supposed to be right before the final round, but I had to scrap it because the by the time I had reached the final round, the story had changed direction completely. I figured I could still post it as a one-shot, though.

_I don't own YYH!_

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><p>"What is this, the friggin dark tournament of love?"<p>

All eyes were on Yusuke as he slammed down one fist on the table and pointed at Kuwabara with the index finger of his free hand.

"Kuwabara, forget about Yukina just for a little while."

The finger pointed in Hiei's direction now.

"Stop thinking with your downstairs brain and use your head, Hiei. All of our lives are on the line, here!" (1)

Hiei growled and Yusuke pointed his finger to Kurama next.

"And Kurama!"

Kurama snapped his head towards Yusuke's direction. Surely he wouldn't be getting lectured; he seemed to be the only one thinking about fighting tactics instead of women.

"Stop turning into Youko, you've got all these fan-girls constantly interrupting our meetings!" Yusuke admonished.

Kurama remained silent, disregarding Yusuke's words. He couldn't help it if the women found Youko attractive, the fact of the matter was he needed the power-boost to overcome Karasu.

"And while you're at it, stop flirting with Kuwabara's sister," he added cheekily.

Kurama's emerald eyes widened considerably and Kuwabara turned to him.

"You're what?"

"It's nothing of the sort, I assure you."

"Oh, I get it. So, my sister isn't good enough for you, huh? Is that it?" Kuwabara questioned defensively.

Kurama put up his hands trying to reassure Kuwabara that the situation was not as it seemed as Yusuke tried to stifle his laughter.

"What about you detective?" Hiei smirked as he crossed his arms haughtily, drawing the attention back to the teen. "It seems your woman's got a tight leash on you. Are you sure you're even allowed to participate in the next match?"

Yusuke's eyes narrowed.

"What was that?"

"You heard me. Did she give you permission to fight, yet? If not you should run on back to her and beg with your tail between your legs."

Kuwabara began to laugh, agreeing wholeheartedly.

"Shorty's got a point there, Urameshi!"

"If we're talking about whipped men, then I'd say you're the one who has it the worst!" Yusuke yelled, turning towards Kuwabara. "Yukina my love let me kiss the ground you walk on!"

At this Hiei snorted condescendingly.

"Shut up shorty, you're the worst of us all!" Kuwabara accused with a glare. Hiei looked up at Kuwabara with a glare of his own as the psychic continued. "You're always trying to ruin things for me and Yukina because you're jealous, but whenever you think nobody is watching, you end up alone with Botan! You're despicable."

At this Hiei's energy flared up dangerously and he clenched his fists.

"Shut up."

"Hiei, calm down," Kurama advised.

Yusuke scrunched up his face.

"Kuwabara, that's sick!"

"It's true. He always interrupts our alone time!"

Hiei growled, his ruby eyes targeting in on Kuwabara.

"Hamster legs is just jealous that Yukina likes me and he doesn't have a chance with her!" Kuwabara continued. "Since he can't have Yukina, he's probably using Botan as a rebound."

"Kuwabara please, you're being ridiculous," Kurama intervened.

"I'm telling the truth! Hiei's got the hots for Yukina!" Kuwabara finished.

"You won't live to regret saying those words," Hiei growled as his left arm moved to unwind the bandages around the arm containing the dragon. In a flash Kurama and Yusuke were on either side of Hiei holding him back as he spewed threats to Kuwabara from across the room.

"What on earth is going on in here?" Botan questioned as she ran into the room looking flustered and out of breath.

Yusuke let go of Hiei's right arm and advanced towards Botan.

"You!" His finger was mere inches away from her face and she stepped back instinctively. "This is all your fault!"

"Me?" Botan's eyes narrowed and she crossed her arms over her chest. "And how in the three worlds did you come up with that brilliant deduction?"

"Because you're a woman! And women are the root of all evil!" Yusuke accused as he threw his hands up in the air, exasperated.

Botan looked to the others for their aid but they all remained silent. Her mouth hung open as they all walked out one by one, seemingly agreeing with Yusuke. Hiei gave her a glare, although far less threatening than his usual ones, it seemed to radiate disapproval as he trudged out the door. Kuwabara shook his head, looked at Botan, and then began shaking his head again before making his way out of the room. Kurama shot her a somewhat apologetic look, but hadn't said a word to her as he walked past her and exited the area. She huffed and ran to the threshold of the door, yelling at the four boys down the hall.

"Yeah? Well girls rule and boys drool!" she exclaimed lamely, brandishing one fist in the air menacingly while wishing she could have given them a better retort.

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><p>(1) Yusuke is the one who usually catches Hiei and Botan in compromising situations, so his line about Hiei thinking with his upstairs brain was referring to that.<p>

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><p>There you have it. If you've read <em>More Than Anyone Else<em>, you can see why this scene doesn't exactly link up with anything that's been going on in the final round. I decided not to have a Kurama x Shizuru interaction, since Shizuru is pretty smitten with Sakyo. Also, with Genkai's death hanging over his shoulders, Yusuke wouldn't be in such a joking mood. Nonetheless, I still wanted to post this up for you all and I hope you liked it. Let me know what you thought!


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